Thoughtful Thursday 105...Who has Hurt You?

Who has hurt you? Who has upset you? Who has lied about you? Who has betrayed you? Just who?

How quickly can you make a list of people who have caused you so much pain? And who were these people who hurt you? Are they Family members? Is it your wife? Is it possibly your husband? Could it be that it is one of your parents? or your children? Or was it a person at work? Or a friend from church? Is it your boyfriend or fiancé?

Just how many friendships have been shattered because of their cruel words, lies or perhaps envy that left you feeling betrayed?

Well, I certainly didn’t want to write about this on this thoughtful Thursday sequel. I wanted to write about the Resurrection Power, the He who is the Resurrection and life but somehow, the Lord pushed me to write exactly how I felt this morning. Anger, Hurt, Betrayal, seething through every opening in my body and especially the physical outburst as saliva seethed outside the space between my gritted teeth.  I was hurt by family, someone close to me or so I thought, I told her things because I saw her as a friend. I forgave her about it but I have never forgotten. She hurt me real bad that I almost wished her death to get lost to hell, I felt so hurt that I even kept off knives deliberately far from me so that I could not be tempted otherwise. Her stupid uncalled for single phone call which I am not sure was out of jealousy or just evil intent brought double tragedy to an already bruised spirit. And from that one call, family relations of many years were completely estranged, never to be mend ever again. Today was a perfect day for revenge and I think I was excited about the opportunity. Not to “kill” as in end life in real sense but to just let them have a dose of their own medicine. I think that saying of what goes round comes round had finally unfolded in front my eyes and I wanted to see how the script will develop.

You see, I forgave a long time but I have never forgotten that betrayal. So I didn’t mind seeing how everything will play out. To be honest, I was looking forward to that, Then I was strongly rebuked in my spirit. To not repay evil for evil but rather repay good for evil. That I cannot carry the mentality of an eye for an eye and a tooth for another if I really want God to forgive me.  That actually, I need to forgive those who hurt me as the Lord forgives me. And I struggled. You see, when the Lord forgives, He forgets about it and as the psalmist writes
“As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.” Psalms 103:12 but when I forgive, I never forget that I was hurt. I battled with the Lord like would any carnal man when He reminded me in His Word to bless those who curse me…I was like, Lord I am not an angel for sure and that sometimes is ‘hard small’ ie ngumu kidogo. Then He reminded me that when you do good to someone who wronged you in a way you are piling coals of hot fire in their heads. But most of all, He reminded me to let him defend the justice of my cause.

To ^17 “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. ¹⁸ If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. ¹⁹ Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. ²⁰ Therefore

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
If he is thirsty, give him a drink;
For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.”

²¹ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.’’ Romans 12:!7-21

So I ended up crying, then praying when I thought about Easter, that Christ Jesus laid down His life and now I am forgiven, redeemed and my sins atoned for. Then I asked the Lord God to teach me to forgive like He forgives us; To forget and remember no more.

Then like a wave on the see, a soft sweeping like feeling overcame me, like something heavy had been lifted off, and I prayed for the one who hurt me. I changed my mind and attitude.

#ForgiventoForgive

#Who’shurtingyou?

Happy Easter good people!